didn't do half the readings, still got a 73. nice.

Well, I gave myself a deadline. I extended that deadline. Still no increase in mood. When I think I'm happy, it lasts a moment and I'm living in constant fear of falling back into the bad mood. Well, I'm here, and I'm stuck.
I'm not one for missing deadlines. This is no exception.
I'm too emotional for all this bullshit. I wasn't built right for this life. I'm always going to be hurt by everything and I'm always going to fall back into depression. I try so hard not to, I put up a real fight today. But it always comes back.
Tonight, I'm going to get really high and drunk, swallow as many sleeping pills as I have left, until I'm drowsy and the blood is pumping real quick through my veins. Then I'm going to cut. I don't know how deep yet. Perhaps just enough to numb the pain for another day. My new favourite spot is right above my veins, it's like I'm teasing the idea of...
This is so sadistic.
See what world I live in?