Sometimes, I lose sight of myself: my happiness, my purpose, my life...
I just don't know why I'm here.
Sometimes, I feel so gray that I can't even decide if I'm happy or sad. It's just 'blah..'
There should be a name for that "I don't even care" feeling.
Sometimes, I think that this type of feeling is almost worse than the suicidal feeling. At least then I could put a label on my emotions. I feel something. Right now, I feel nothing.
And you don't know how difficult it is to go on with everyday life, to write an essay for school, to have a conversation with your boyfriend, to even tell yourself you're hungry and should eat,
when all you feel is n o t h i n g.
Somebody come find me.

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There are days when feeling happy seems so effortless.
This is not one of those days.
Sometimes, I feel like succumbing to the darkness is a lot easier. Maybe it's what I was made for..