Odd :/

Today I ate like a 'normal' person.
I had an exam, so I woke up and ate breakfast (2 eggs, 1 piece of cal-reduced toast with peanut butter, 3 strawberries, 6 blueberries, 3 blackberries, 3/4 banana and a glass of milk)...I couldn't stomach it so it just came right back out :/ (totally not my fault.)
Then, I came home and ate salad, light vegetable soup, and a kaiser roll with butter. I wanted to be healthy until I finish my exams. I've been trying to eat a healthy intake for the past couple of days so I can just get through this stressful week, but I end up hating myself for it.
Is there something wrong with me because I think there's something wrong with being healthy, or at least wanting to be healthy?
I ended up eating 5 saltine crackers...4 cupcakes (ERGG)...4 mini chocolates (double EERRRG)...and now I'm eating popcorn.
fudgecrackerrsssssss >:(
I hate this. I can't BE healthy and happy at the same time. At least when I restrict, I get a high from the scale's low number. But now, eating healthy, I'm too afraid to go on the scale...and I STILL BINGED. Healthy doesn't solve anything.
I was going to have rice and vegetarian chicken, but I doubt that's going to happen. Back to restricting for me. My exam will just have to deal.
Starting now.No set calorie limits, just stay low.
No junk food. I'll bring back binge fridays to keep me on track.
Tomorrow's plan:
1-2pmish: fruit, yogurt
at work (~8 pm): apple
and that will be it. stick to that, fatty.

and on a slightly happier note, I've officially accepted my offer of admission to the University of Ottawa for Health Sciences in French Immersion. yay :)

Well, I'm tired so peace out (: